Gossip Hurts... You

Gossip Hurts... You
This is a Reblogged Post, Original Source listed below.

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." - Ephesians 4:29

"A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret." - Proverbs 11:13


What is gossip? Gossip is talking about someone else’s private matters, passing on people's secrets to others who don’t need to know, or be, involved.

Gossip can really hurt, because the person being gossiped about feels a loss of privacy, and may be 'shunned' by those 'in the know', leading to a loss of belonging. It leads to loss of trust and emotional baggage / neagativity, wasting productive time and energy. This in turn can lead to maliciousness, an 'us' versus 'them' culture, in the workplace, school, or community.

But what’s the difference between gossiping and just sharing information, and how do we draw the line?

First, the heart of it. God describes a gossip as someone whose intent is wrong. Their heart is not for the other person, the words are not spoken from a desire to help or from a heart of love, it is only meant to tear down.

Second, the words. What flows from the heart of a gossip, the information being shared, is often something that would bring shame or hurt. It's negative. It's cruel. It focuses on someone's faults instead of speaking words of life from a heart that believes for the best. It refuses to have hope for change or healing in another person. It's damaging.

If the story needs to be told in hushed tones, or you’d stop talking if the person you’re talking about came into the room, then it’s gossip. If there is any intention to make someone else think less of the person you’re talking about, then it’s gossip. If there’s any kind of complaint, negative judgment or desire for power or revenge that fuels your desire to share it, it’s gossip.

Ask yourself what you’ve been getting out of gossiping, and what it’s been costing you. Ask yourself if gossiping is really in alignment with the kind of person you want to be, and if what you’re saying is something you’d be willing to have published in the newspaper, or to say in front of the person you’re talking about. Choosing not to share in hurtful information is the important thing. We all possess such great potential to influence others around us, in the right direction, and it’s right on the tip of our tongues.


Source Attributions:

Debbie McDaniel, "2 Ways Gossip Hurts and How You Can Quit" in iBelieve.com. Retrieved from http://www.ibelieve.com/relationships/2-ways-gossip-hurts-and-how-you-can-quit.html

Leslie Ayres, "Kick the Gossip Habit" in The Job Search Guru. Retrieved from http://www.thejobsearchguru.com/notesfrom/kick-the-gossip-habit/